After a year waiting, Alhamdulillah today is the first day of fasting month which I hope everyone is well prepared to celebrate Ramadhan this year. By celebrating Ramadhan in the year of 2013 shows that it has been a year since I pay a visit to Baitullah and I have to admit, a year can make people change easily.
I can still remember how I was so touched by seeing the Kaabah for the first time that tears started to roll down my cheeks without I realizing it. At that time, mixed feelings filled in my heart and mind where I felt so small, sinful, humble and etc to Allah the Almighty. I miss the moments which I can feel the close relationship between us. Where I feel He is hearing what I am asking for, He is looking at me praying to Him, He knows what I feel in my heart and He reads everything inside me. I know He does not even forget me even in a short second. But how could I, a normal human being, whom always asking for things from Him could forget Him not only for a second, but minutes, hours and days. Since my last day in Makkah and Madinah, I promised myself to change for the better Muslimah living. However, I am a human being that at times, I do forget. Ya Rabb, I hope You forgive all my wrongdoings.
By living for 23 years in the Dunya, I should say yesterday was the first day I really understand the meanings of Surah Al Fatihah. All this while, I got all the praise words from my family and friends for my achievements in reading the Quran since I was in primary school. I first finished the Quran when I was in Standard 3. But, all the praises and the proud gone in just a second when, I read the tafseer of the Holy Quran and I found that, I learned Quran, I read Quran, I studied Arab but I don't even know the translation of Fatiha. What a shameful of me. I did attend classes for Tilawah Al Quran when I was in my university years but I realized now that I learned the meanings of the first surah in the Quran but not to practice. Ya Allah, I am your small little sinful slave, please guide me to the right path. Indeed, You are the most Beneficent and Merciful. Amin.
To all, here is the translation of Suratul Fatihah. The Surah that tells us and teaches us, it is Him we are praying to and He is the One we are beseeching for. From Him we are from and to Him we are to. In Shaa Allah, we will be better and trying to be better from now on.
